The Bartenders and Hay-Bailers of Cleveland Have a Thing or Two to Say to Lebron

Here’s a video that’s been circling the internets for a few days now, and with that timeframe adjusted for the online equivalent of dog years, it’s no wonder that it instantly went viral and has been viewed something like a billion times now.

It should come as a surprise to absolutely no one that the now infamous “Rise” commercial, featuring what B.S. has dubbed a “defiantly rhetorical” Lebron James, ruffled more than a few feathers among the throngs of embittered Cavaliers fans who were left to pick up the pieces after the King decided to relocate his considerable talents down to South Beach.

Whether it was the peculiarly aggressive tone of the commercial, the utter refusal to offer anything remotely resembling an act of contrition, the not-so-subtle undertones of his own perceived victimization throughout this debacle, or simply the proverbial reopening of a freshly-sealed wound, the people of Cleveland, understandably, did not take kindly to it, hence this video rebuttal, courtesy of Cleveland-area filmmaker Dan Wantz.

The conceit is clever enough: it’s a spoof of the “Rise” commercial, using choice clips from the actual commercial while interspersing a socioeconomically diverse collection of everyday Clevelanders ostensibly taking time out of their daily blue-collar routines of bailing hay and shaving the backs of people’s necks to chime in with their incensed responses to the “What Should I Do?” mantra.

For the most part, the sentiments echoed here aren’t much different from what we’ve been hearing all along – you shouldn’t have told us on TV, you’re a traitor, you’re a quitter, you said you’d stay until you won a championship, etc. – but by far the most incisive comment comes in response to “Should I really believe I ruined my legacy?” Simply put: legacy?

Though the barbers and hay-bailers have a point, I tend to prefer Chad Zumock’s more straightforward “Just Apologize” piece. South Park’s Tony Hayward spoof is quite enjoyable as well.

Chad talks to LeBron from Jef Etters on Vimeo.

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One Response to The Bartenders and Hay-Bailers of Cleveland Have a Thing or Two to Say to Lebron

  1. SloTalkinJon says:

    Can you blame the guy?… I mean, LeBron was a puppet of one of the filthiest, crime ridden cities in the US. Would you go to Cleveland? I’ve been there. It blows and I never want to go back and I’m from Memphis. It’s like they wanted to say “Here LeBron, here’s all the money and you stay here and throw talcum powder in the air and play for a sub-par team.” No one wants to play there and live in that guy’s shadow, especially since he gets the most cheddar. Instead it would be another year of playing with such quality NBA stars like, Mo Williams, Andy Varajao, and DeLonte West who perhaps hooked up with his mama, ooooh snap!… He wanted a defender, someone who could help him up front. Who did they get for him? A senior citizen. What an insult. Asking for defense help and getting Shaq now is like me getting that Discman I asked for Christmas 15 years ago and getting it now. In my opinion, as far as all the free agents and the teams who wanted to keep their star, it appears that Miami’s front office was the only one that had a determined brainchild working full throttle to keep their man. Now, in terms of whether it will get these guys a ring in the current state of playing chemistry is another topic altogether. However, Miami has the stars and Cleveland and Toronto have a bunch of D-listers striving for boards. Boohoo… As far as Lebron’s legacy, there is no legacy and there won’t be one for anyone until Kobe Bryant and Phil “I have a deal with Satan” Jackson throw in the towel. Lebron and everyone who follows this guy needs to get over it. I believe he’s a great player but his time to achieve legacy status has elapsed 4 years ago, and I hope he recognizes that everytime he faces Tim Duncan, Manu Ginobli, and Tony Parker. That was your chance buddy… You gave it good run. Maybe you can swallow your pride and become a Laker one day. Shaq did.

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